“The wound is the place where the light enters you” ~ Rumi
I don’t know about you, but the world has felt heavy lately. As sensitive women, we’re often hyperaware of the pain and suffering of those around us and those across the globe. And it’s not just people. We’re highly attuned to the plight of the earth and the animals, as well. We feel things deeply and can easily get bogged down with the weight of it all. It can seem harder to experience joy and lightness during times that feel dark.
The good news is that we can feel joy at a deeper level, too. But to do so, we must first learn to be with and process our feelings of grief, sorrow and despair about the suffering we see happening in the world. Too many people want to spread love and light, which is a beautiful and worthy thing to do, but the energy behind it will not be authentic if we’re just glossing over, bypassing or minimizing our pain.
So what do we do if we want to experience more joy, but we can’t tune out or turn a blind eye to the pain of the world? For many reasons, and especially in this case, self-care is non-negotiable. It’s not an option. But what do I mean by self-care? A good book and a bubble bath? A leisurely walk at the end of the day? These are lovely activities to engage in if they bring more peace to your heart and restoration to your nervous system.
But I’m also talking about something more, something that offers a deeper level of soul and spirit connection and a deeper level of healing and transformation – letting yourself be present to truly embody and feel your emotions so they can naturally move through you and transmute into growth and expansion.
While not always easy, this practice can be simple. First, it’s important to limit distractions. Our nervous systems weren’t made to take in the onslaught of information we have available to us 24/7. Turn off the news. Set daily time limits on social media or take social media vacations (for example, no social media one day every week or no social media on the weekends).
Set aside 20 – 30 minutes when you can be by yourself in a safe and comforting place. Close your eyes and go inward. Tune into your body, your internal senses and see if you can identify any sensations you feel. Name a particular emotion you’ve been experiencing recently, such as grief or sadness. Describe how that emotion feels in your body. Let’s say you’re feeling sadness. How do you know it’s sadness? Does the sadness have a shape, a color, a texture? Notice all that is present in your awareness about the sadness.
Next, check in with your body and ask if there’s any movement your body wants to make to express this sadness (or other emotion you identified). Maybe your body wants to softly sway or jump up and down. You can also listen to music you connect with and engage in free dance – letting your body guide your movement without needing it to look any particular way. Let your body move in whatever way you feel called to move.
What about your voice? Are there any sounds or words that want to be vocalized? Let yourself emote. Let yourself scream, cry or make whatever sounds need to come out. Be in and with the emotion. Your voice can be a powerful tool for processing emotion without needing to actually talk about it. Primal sounds such as grunting, gurgling, screaming, crying, yelling, mewling and whimpering can be quite effective ways to help process and move through challenging emotions.
While this all might seem strange, remember, no one is watching you. One reason emotions can be difficult to move through is because we tend to put such tight and restrictive rules around what we do with our feelings. Often this includes pushing them down and holding them in. But emotions are not meant to be suppressed. They need to be expressed. We need to feel to heal.
Once you have engaged in this process, you may find yourself feeling tired or fatigued. Allow yourself time to rest. Drink some soothing tea. This would also be a good time to take that walk in nature, call a friend, take a warm bath or read a good book.
At this point, you’ll likely find yourself feeling lighter and more open to noticing the beauty in the world. Joy is easier to recognize and embody when we’ve processed our more challenging emotions. We’re bombarded daily with news of all the horrible things in the world. But remember, those things are highlighted because they grab people’s attention. There is just as much good and joy in the world if we’re able to notice and be present to it. And this is much easier to do when we allow ourselves to experience our full range of emotions instead of trying to suppress, bypass or close ourselves off to those that feel more painful.